Earlier this week, Notre Dame caught on fire and now I know which of my friends, family and coworkers have been there.
If you’re not much of a social media user, maybe you don’t get the joke. It’s a snarky one, as usual. Just me pointing out how long it takes for people to insert themselves into a story about the destruction of a 12th century cathedral.
There are two schools of thought on posting pictures after a tragedy. One is that the photo honors the place and shows solidarity with the people who most closely experience the loss. The other is that it’s shallow behavior, an opportunity to repost old vacation pictures to France or New Zealand or wherever else the headlines take us.
Personally, I think that the posts are tacky. Disagree? Well you’re in good company. Most people – including Barack Obama, a man whose judgment I trust implicitly – appear to be in favor of sharing personal photos reminding us of Notre Dame’s former glory and also that they experienced it personally. My position is what we call an “unpopular opinion.” And since I’m in a bad mood this week (we’ll get to that), it feels like a great time to share some others.
Stepping onto the train before other passengers have had a chance to exit the train ought to be a crime punishable by being struck by every piece of luggage being unloaded, up to and including bicycles.
Giving a charitable donation in someone else’s name is not a good gift. If the giver wants to support a cause, they should do it on their own dime. If the recipient wants their name attached to a charity, they’ll put it there themselves.
White chocolate is not chocolate, brunch is passé and people should stop putting turmeric in drinks.
Asian tourists are keeping the lights on. Stop complaining about them.
Women who do not use the men’s room when the ladies room has a line and the men’s room does not are part of the problem.
Got something to say? Good luck. I’ll be done and gone by the time you work up the nerve to step out of line.
Attendees of a destination wedding are not obligated to buy gifts. Out of town wedding guests are not obligated to buy gifts. Friends experiencing financial hardship are not obligated to buy gifts. In fact, here is a complete list of people who are obligated to buy a wedding gift: NO ONE.
Every blogger should expect people to receive unsolicited feedback and commentary about their writing. If you don’t want to hear what random people on the internet think, then stop being one of them.
Dogs can be kept outdoors!
Men shouldn’t say anything to a woman that they wouldn’t want another man to say to them in prison. (credit: @jonathanmtucker)
Stop inviting your adult friends to attend children’s birthday parties, religious events or other life milestones. You know we don’t want to go and your kids don’t want us there either.
Billing a class as “Hot Yoga” is misleading. The name should be changed to “Sauna Yoga” so that people know they’re really walking into a warm room full of weirdos.
If you’re putting skim milk into coffee to “save calories,” I’d like to see the math on that.
Any company that reports a 23 percent local wage gap should fix said wage gap by giving all women a 23 percent raise, plus a lump sum payment for past lost income. They should, at the very least, not try to explain this disparity with stupid excuses, such as:
There are no women at the highest levels of our company because we do not hire or promote women to senior positions.
In the UK this number is even higher and that’s to say nothing of what’s happening in the States.
We’re not even legally required to share this information, we’re just doing it to make you mad!
And my personal favourite: Your babies stole that money, ladies!
Twenty. Three. Percent. I guess that’s the cost of being a working woman. I’ll stop complaining about it on my lady blog when they start paying me.
Agree? Disagree? Have unpopular opinions of your own? Tell me in the comments. I’m a blogger who accepts feedback!
I love you.
I love you too!
You are a Stitch. No arguments from me on any of these (although I confess to extreme reluctance to using the men’s room because…have you SEEN men’s rooms? Even my husband is frequently appalled.) May I share the one about things men should not say to women (I’ll include the credit, of course)?
100% – it’s gold. If men don’t understand it in those terms, then they never will!
Also, you raise a good point. I’ve seen men’s rooms… Counterpoint: I’ve also seen women’s rooms! :P
I was at a restaurant this weekend standing in line for BBQ when my daughter noticed that I had bird poop in my hair. We had been walking outside for a while before we decided to get some dinner. So of course, I reached up and touched it and it was very wet. The line was right next to the bathrooms. I stood FOREVER waiting for that one person to get out of the women’s bathroom so I could wash my hands. It just wasn’t happening. There was no line for the men’s room. I went in and washed my hands and got some very strange looks from both men and women when I came out.
oh I feel for you. I feel like I would have done this too, but then would have made it even worse by trying to explain on my way out… like, “Well I HAD TO in this case because I HAD POOP IN MY HAIR.” but seriously – use the men’s room as needed. these things are a construct of our social imagination.
The best dressed women in a ladies’ room are the ones who frequently make the biggest messes and at least while they are standing on the toilet (yeuw germs) they could try to hit the damn middle of the toilet…
AMEN.
I got back at one of them, she came out of the stall looking quite elegant, and there was a fair wad of wet TP stuck on her shoe. I didn’t have the heart to embarrass her, so I let her saunter out into the mall complex leaving little wet spots when she walked.
I think of her often. It makes me smile.
ha! I feel you. some women just don’t want to hear our ideas, Judy!
Yes. All of it.
Rock on, Nova.
Thank you! & Thanks for reading. xx
“Men shouldn’t say anything to a woman that they wouldn’t want another man to say to them in prison.” is maybe the best rule I’ve ever heard.
RIIIIGHT??????
I’m Team Unpopular for all mentioned items except for the idea of brunch being passe. I love brunch so very much and also day drinking (…and also a proper night’s sleep), and these things are very much intertwined ;).
I so enjoy your writing, Nova!!
xo
Fair. I also love day drinking and sleeping. $20 eggs? Not so much. But these are minor points. :) In all seriousness, thanks so much for reading. And I appreciate the compliment. I’m enjoying seeing how good life has gotten for you in CA.
xx
The dogs! I’m a country girl, my dad has always had hunting dogs….you don’t bring them indoors EVER!! Not when it’s hot, not when it’s cold, NEVER! You make sure they have food and fresh water, shade in the summer and straw for insulation in the winter.
Every season when the posts get shared I want to scream that you aren’t making me feel bad, you are just making me regret our friendship because of your ignorance!
(Everything else was pretty spot on too, this just struck a cord.)
RIIIGHT???? I, too, come from a place where dogs can be outdoor pets… and they don’t come with a price tag equivalent to a time share or a full wardrobe.
my goodness you ARE in a cranky mood, Nova. apparently so am I.
Having participated in not a few ‘family’ get togethers for holidays, and brunches as well, I just wish these wonderful people (and Im not being sarcastic here) would learn how to cook. and no, overcooked bacon and cold waffles are not edible.
YEAH, I KNOW JUDY. I SAID THAT. WHAT ABOUT IT????
I kid. Something about that wage gap has me feeling 23% more feisty.
I agree with you completely. Also, little known fact: I can rarely stomach eggs. Brunch is just not my thing.
I agree with all of these, but especially the one where you’re invited to a kid’s party. It’s torture and always makes my cheeks hurt from all the fake smiling. No thanks.
I like you 23% snarkier, it makes you at least 23% funnier too!
well thank you! good luck on book #2… so excited for you. and I promise to buy them both as a package deal :)
Yes, yes, yes, yes. All spot on and brilliant.
thank you!!